Traffic Was A Bitch

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Friday night was supposed a be a fun ‘night off’ – a reward for surviving a couple of spetacularly crappy weeks.

Within an hour of getting home (in ascending order of magnitude):I accidently deleted all my posts off this blog; something’s wrong with our hot water, so we have to use the kettle when we want hot water; we discovered an infestation of moth maggots in our pantry, so we’ve had to clean out the entire thing and throw away most of our food; and it became apparent our cat was missing and has presumably taken himself off somewhere to die.

It’s come as a bit of a shock – he was old (just turned 15), but outwardly seemed his normal self. We searched until it was dark and later with flashlights through the night. I cannot tell you how awful it is to not have been able to say goodbye or to imagine him in pain, but out of our reach and unable to do anything. This mornng I searched through the reserve for hours, which means wading through mud up to my knee and tall grass, higher than my head. After I was completely covered in mud from slipping and falling a few times, I gave up and proceeded to write to my neighbours to cordially ask them to look for his body on their properties. I hold no hope, though, that we will be able to even bury him, much less ever know for certain what happened to him.

I wish I had been able to say goodbye to you Topaz and tell you how much I love you. If there is a heaven, then you are surely in it.

My last two photos of him:

And now I have to prepare myself to go do uni work. So, in conclusion: Fuck you, universe. Fuck you very much.